Don't be afraid to lay a stinky egg bomb

In an interview with the Foo Fighters recently, Jack Black asked the band if their song ideas ever dry up. The answer was no.

JB: "You never have the fear that you are now empty... ever."

FF: "That's not to say that I think we write the greatest songs ever in the history of songs. But I feel like we could go into the studio for a week and come out with something."

JB: "It's a confidence thing. You have enormous confidence. You're not afraid to fail and lay a stinky egg bomb."

One of the band members talked about meeting Neil Diamond and asking him the same question, as Neil Diamond had started out as a songwriter who had to write for a living. He said that songwriting is like a muscle. If you don't write for a long time the first batch is probably not going to be that great, and that you have to keep the muscles toned.

The Foo Fighters mentioned that a lot of their best songs come at the end of a writing cycle, when the muscle is "built" and warmed up. That is, "Keep your song muscle hard."

Jack Black also asked about old songs that didn't make it onto albums.

JB: "The rest of them, that didn't make it on that first album, did they make it on future albums?"

FF: "No."

JB: "Those just went into the furnace."

FF: "Pretty much. We've got a lot of those over the last 15 years. We'll start in on an album with, like 30, and then wind up with 12. And the other 18 sometimes come back, but they never make it, because they didn't in the first place. It sucked then, it sucks now."

These comments made a lot of sense to me as a writer and speaker.

First, you have to have the confidence to keep putting out new material and trying new things, even if you're not 100% sure it's your greatest. You can take the risk of putting out something less than stellar, or you can not put out anything at all. Which one will move you forward?

Second, you have to keep your creative muscles toned. Keep writing, keep presenting, even if it's giving your elevator speech at networking events. Keep practicing, because your speaking, writing and creating muscles can get flabby!

Third, not everything you put out there is going to be fabulous, and that's okay. Those bits and pieces of writing and material may come back again and they might even fit into a new presentation or a new book. And they might not. But don't stop producing just because you're afraid of laying a stinky egg bomb.

Look at the successful people around you. Look at your favorite musicians, actors, athletes, and business role models. What lessons can you learn from them?

First impressions follow you everywhere

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Hypothetical situation: You're a person who is highly visible in the community. You are a well-known business owner, a philanthropist, or a politician. People talk about you; media covers anything you do.

You're having a bad day and an annoying stranger cuts in line ahead of you. You are less than friendly about it. Word gets around.

Someone calls your home and your spouse can't be bothered to take a message. People talk.

Because people know who you are, there is no time or place that you are not "on."

You, reader, may think you're lucky to escape the constant scrutiny of the public as an average citizen. But the truth is, if you want to be successful as a speaker or business owner -- or anyone else who relies on other people for your livelihood -- you might want to rethink that.

Here's another hypothetical situation: You've been engaged to speak for the local Junior League chapter. You're driving to the meeting and someone cuts you off on the freeway. You honk your horn, yell some obscenities, maybe even (no, not YOU!) flip them off.

You get to the meeting and -- guess what -- the person on the freeway is the president of the organization you're speaking for.

Or you're staying at a hotel where you're speaking at a conference. You get into an elevator to go to your room, and as someone runs for the elevator, you let it close. So what? Next day, you find that person in your seminar, surrounded by influential colleagues. You may have thought it was no big deal, but that person now considers you exceedingly rude.

It may sound like I'm saying that you should always be on your best behavior because you never know when you're going to encounter a client or even a prospective client, and you want to make a good impression. And yes, that's true.

But really, we make an impression everywhere we go. If you really want to make a good impression all the time, you just have to be a good person. It's a lot of work to always be wondering who's watching. It's actually a lot less work to stop worrying about who's watching and just be a better person all the time.

And, by the way, if you are a person in the public eye, you might want to train your family members on how to take your phone calls. Unfortunately, they are an extension of your brand and your business, and their bad behavior can harm you just like your own can.

First impressions follow you, everywhere you go. Remember that.

How useful are you?

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When reading this post by Scott Ginsberg, I was struck by how similar his tips for making money are to tips for giving a successful presentation. Check it out...

"9. Revenue is the aftershock of usefulness.

If you want to make money, make something that people need. If you want to make money, make something that replaces something. If you want to make money, make something that doesn’t require explaining. If you want to make money, make something that helps people say goodbye to something they hate.

If you want to make money, make something that makes people stop, sit up, notice, and yell into the kitchen, “Hey honey, look at this!” If you want to make money, make something that solves people’s expensive, urgent, pervasive and relevant problems. If you want to make money, make something that saves people time and frustration. If you want to make money, make something that is appealing to more than just yourself and your two roommates.

If you want to make money, make something worth making a series of YouTube videos about that people will (actually) watch instead of rolling their eyes and deleting from their inbox when their mom sends it to them. If you want to make money, make something that people never realized they wanted – but after trying it – can’t possibly imagine surviving without. How useful are you?"

How about this:

If you want to give a successful presentation, give information about something that people need.

If you want to give a successful presentation, share resources that help people say goodbye to something they hate.

If you want to give a successful presentation, offer content that solves people’s expensive, urgent, pervasive and relevant problems.

If you want to give a successful presentation, provide solutions that save people time and frustration.

If you want to give a successful presentation, deliver material that is appealing to more than just yourself and your two roommates.

And so on...

It stands to reason, then, that if you give successful presentations, you might also make more money in the process! Meeting the needs of the audience, making yourself useful, providing relevant tools and resources... This is a win-win situation for everyone involved.

How can you be more useful?

L.O.V.E.

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I watched the Michael Jackson movie "This is It" last night. There were so many messages that seemed relevant to pass along. Here are a few of my thoughts.

Communication

When MJ wants to make his ideas clear to the musicians, he uses evocative words like "simmer" and "sizzle." At one point, he tells the music supervisor to slow down the beat like "you're dragging yourself out of bed." He also suggests not rushing the music in order to "nourish" the audience.

He always tries to find a way to describe his experience or the experience he's looking for in a way that is understandable to those listening. His communication is minimalist but efficient.

Calm

There's a sense that, no matter how big and complex this show, MJ will never lose his cool. He has a sense of calm about him that seems to make others relaxed -- no one seems stressed out in this film!

It's all about the audience

In a pep talk to his cast and crew at the end of the movie, he says, "There's no need to be nervous." He describes the show as "an adventure, a great adventure." Of the audience, he says, "We want to take them places they've never been before. We want to show them talent like they've never seen before."

Director Kenny Ortega said in an interview with MTV, "The fans meant everything to Michael. They were his food, his fuel, his life source, his energy, and he was energized by them and he appreciated their loyalty more than I can ever say. This film is for the fans."

Throughout the movie, MJ pays attention to every detail of the show, partly because he has a vision that he's trying to achieve, but also because he wants the audience to get it. He wants the audience to have the best possible experience.

Gratitude

He is thankful for each person involved in the production. He's thankful for his audience. When he gives direction to his crew, his response is always, "God bless you." There is a constant sense of gratitude on the set.

Humility

When his colleagues applaud him, he "throws" it back to them. When Orianthi Panagaris, a sensational young Australian guitarist, comes downstage for her solo, he reminds her to go for it: "It's your time to shine." (Check out video of her playing below.) He personally meets with the dancers and singers to go over rehearsal pieces instead of leaving it up to choreographers and music directors.

While he is obviously the star of the show and the man in charge, he never forgets that he is not alone and that he is relying on the talents of others to make this production the best it can be. He is a collaborator and a coach as well as the star.

The best of the best

MJ knows to surround himself with the best people in the industry. The dancers, the musicians, the singers, the crew: these people are the best at what they do. When he explains how a piece of music should sound or how to cue a sound effect, he doesn't have to say it twice. These people get things done.

Love

"It's all for love. L.O.V.E."

This may sound corny, but there's a lot of love in this movie. You can't miss MJ's love for his art and his music. You can't miss his love for his fans and his colleagues. When you love what you do, your audience can't help but absorb that positive energy.

This movie shows what it takes to be a creative visionary and a top performer. You can see the blend of talent and skill that goes into being an artist like Michael Jackson. You can also see how putting the audience first has made Michael Jackson millions of fans around the world, including the people hired to work with him on this production.

There are some valuable lessons we can all learn as speakers and performers from watching this movie. Doesn't hurt that it's also as entertaining as heck!

The curse is back!

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One of my favorite concepts to illustrate from "Made to Stick" is the Curse of Knowledge. I've written about it here and here.

We all have some kind of knowledge that others don't have. It becomes a curse when we fail to recognize that what is obvious to us is completely opaque to someone else. Then we have miscommunication, resentment, boredom and all kinds of negative consequences.

Here's an example of the curse that was passed along to me confidentially. No names will be revealed!

Eleanor Entrepreneur has been invited to advertise on Tracy TV's television show. Eleanor Entrepreneur wants to know the benefits to her business and the return on investment of this advertising package. Tracy TV shares with Eleanor Entrepreneur a handout describing "What it takes to produce a television show" in hopes that Eleanor will see the value of contributing her advertising dollars.

(Do I even have to tell you that this is all about the benefit to the television show, and not at all about Eleanor Entrepreneur? But putting that aside...)

Here's the list Eleanor Entrepreneur was given of "What it takes to produce a television show":

Research -- cutting edge -- up to date

Writing -- organizing script, facts, people

Interviews

Shooting video

Lighting

Audio

Director

6 associates

Editing time 1 minute = 3-5 hours

Opening -- design, editing

Locations

Does this make any sense to you? Does it answer any questions? Does it tell you one thing about the time, cost or equipment required to produce a TV show? (This question is obviously for those of you who don't know anything about producing a TV show.)

I laughed out loud when I looked at this list. The TV people clearly think this handout is going to help them gain advertising. However, unless they can overcome their curse of knowledge, the list will only confuse their prospects and as the saying goes, "A confused mind always says no."

Always, ALWAYS make sure that you are explaining concepts in the clearest, simplest, most explicit terms. Do not ever assume that people understand what you're talking about, especially if you are talking about specific industry or business terms that might be considered jargon or lingo.

You don't want to alienate people. You want to draw people to you. You want people to relate to you. You want people to get you. That's how you persuade, sell or motivate.

The curse of knowledge has an antidote: Put yourself in the shoes of your listener. Imagine they don't know what you know. Then make your ideas simple for them. Curse removed!

Is your vocab in a rut?

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About ten years ago I was interviewed for my high school alumni magazine. When I read the article for fact checking, what stood out was how little the quotes sounded like me. The writer had taken some artistic license with my words, one of which was apparently "terrific." I don't say "terrific." "Fabulous" or "awesome," but not "terrific." However, I know the writer, and she says "terrific."

We all get into word ruts. We find a word we like and we stick with it. I used to say "a few" until I picked up on my husband's use of "several." Now I say "several" all the time.

During Rachel Maddow's interview with David Brancaccio the other day, Brancaccio said "bunch" a bunch of times (well, only three times) instead of "a lot," or "many," for example. It was noticeable just because he repeated it. And we all do this.

We all have different sets of words we're comfortable with, a language and speaking style we've developed throughout our lives. In addition, not all the words we know are words we speak. Wikipedia explains this well:

"Reading vocabulary

A person's reading vocabulary is all the words he or she can recognize when reading. This is the largest type of vocabulary simply because it includes the other three.

Listening vocabulary

A person's listening vocabulary is all the words he or she can recognize when listening to speech. This vocabulary is aided in size by context and tone of voice.

Writing vocabulary

A person's writing vocabulary is all the words he or she can employ in writing. Contrary to the previous two vocabulary types, the writing vocabulary is stimulated by its user.

Speaking vocabulary

A person's speaking vocabulary is all the words he or she can use in speech. Due to the spontaneous nature of the speaking vocabulary, words are often misused. This misuse – though slight and unintentional – may be compensated by facial expressions, tone of voice, or hand gestures."

How do we explore our vocabulary and get greater usage from it? When I suggest exploring your vocabulary, I'm not suggesting using bigger or more complicated words, or necessarily learning more words (although that's not a bad idea). What I am suggesting is saying what you really mean and using vocabulary to be more clear in your communication. Especially if, like me, you find yourself in a rut using the same words over and over, and you know there are better options.

Say you want to describe something that happened that was "really bad." Was it tragic? Was it horrific? Was it traumatic? Was it scary? Was it gnarly? (A SoCal reference, if that one's not in your vocab.) Was it all of the above? What are you really trying to say? Each word adds a different nuance to the story.

Even if you're not much of a reader, try to find some time for reading books, magazines or newspapers to refresh your vocabulary. And if you come across a word you're not familiar with, get out your dictionary or bookmark one for online reference. When I was a kid, "Look it up!" was an everyday exclamation in our house. We also played a lot of word games, like Scrabble and Boggle. Yes, I'm a word nerd, but you don't have to be one to find the value in stimulating your vocabulary.

Also, consider using a thesaurus when you find yourself stuck in a rut. I use Thesaurus.com almost daily when writing, to make sure I'm not using the same stale old words but -- and this is important -- I try to find words that are still "me." If I never say "terrific" in conversation, it's doubtful I'm going to use it in a blog post.

Here's a page on building your vocabulary with some entertaining (I wanted to say "fun" but forced myself not to) quizzes and a lot of helpful links.

Are you mispronounciating your words?

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A client told me recently that she sometimes has trouble pronouncing words properly because she was raised by parents from another country and still has a bit of their accent at times. I suggested that she's not pronouncing words incorrectly if that's how they're pronounced in another English-speaking country. But she's self-conscious about it, so I decided to devote today's blog post to pronunciation.

How do you know if you're pronouncing words properly? You probably don't, because most of us have ways of speaking that we've developed over a lifetime of influence from parents, friends, our culture, and our state or region. The way we say things is the way we say things, and no one is going to tell us when we're wrong.

However, there are some words that are frequently mispronounced by native English speakers that have nothing to do with region or accent. One of the very first blog posts I wrote three years ago was about the mispronunciation of the word "a." There is one pronunciation for the word "a" and a different pronunciation for the letter "a."

Here are some other words that are frequently mispronounced/misunderstood. How many of these do you say?

No: Antartic | Yes: Antarctic

No: card shark | Yes: cardsharp

No: chomp at the bit | Yes: champ at the bit

No: excape | Yes: escape

No: expresso | Yes: espresso

No: forte (fortay) | Yes: fort (I only discovered this about a year ago!)

No: heighth | Yes: height

No: mannaise | Yes: mayonnaise

No: nuptual | Yes: nuptial

No: perculate | Yes: percolate

No: sherbert | Yes: sherbet

No: supposably | Yes: supposedly

No: triathalon | Yes: triathlon

For more fun with mispronounced words, check out this list. You will be shocked to see some of these; I guarantee it. You can click on the link for each correct word and hear the proper pronunciation.

If you're not sure about a word, look it up. Study lists like the one above to make sure you know what you're talking about. Pronunciation plays a big role in a presentation; don't let yours be a distraction to the audience. Maintain your credibility and authority as a speaker and an expert by using and pronouncing words properly.